The Day Has Come

Well today is the day. Today is the first day I will have to give Ivy formula. As you all know, I have been exclusively pumping breastmilk for Ivy since she was born. A few months ago I dropped down to only 3 pumps a day and with that came a drop in my supply. I wasn't worried because I had a bunch of frozen milk so I figured it would be fine. I only have one bag of frozen milk left so today I will have to start supplementing formula for 2-3 bottles a day. I was really hoping this day wouldn't come. I was hoping I could get my supply back up so that I was producing as much as she is drinking but I didn't. I probably still could but it would mean pumping around the clock again and I just don't feel like it. I feel a little selfish about it but I am already so tired with Ivy not sleeping well at night and I am busy during the day taking care of Ivy and the house. I just don't want to be tied to the pump again. I don't want to miss things because I have to pump. I don't want to listen to my sweet baby cry because she wants to be held but I need to pump. So formula.....that's where we're at. I will continue to pump and Ivy will get the majority of her daily calories from breastmilk still so that is good.

Ok...just needed to get that out of my system. I am sad about it but I know it is fine. I am just disappointed that I didn't maintain my supply well enough. I am also very proud that I am continuing to pump so that Ivy can have breastmilk. I know a lot of women who have had major issues with establishing or maintaining their milk supply so I am very lucky that I have been able to pump for this long and I am going to continue pumping as much as I can until I decide to stop.